Dear People Who Think Marriage is the End-All-Be-All,
It's not. We singles really do have our lives together and we do a
pretty good job at successfully living without a spouse (for example I
am surviving right now as I type this). I understand that someone might
have taught you this along the way, but they're wrong.
While you're learning that singles are functioning human beings,
understand that those of us who may be in the age "when we should be
getting married," are not married for good reasons. That good reason can
range from broken relationships, to not finding the right guy yet, to
simply not wanting to get married yet and really no matter the reason,
they are all good reasons.
Please don't get me wrong, I have nothing against marriage. I believe it
is a beautiful covenant shown to us by Jesus and the church and I pray
that one day I will be able to make that commitment to a man. I don't
know when that will happen, and though I have those days where it seems
like it will never happen, I know either way I'll be ok and that God is
still good.
A husband will not complete me. It's just not possible for another
human being to do that, they are imperfect. The only one that is perfect
is Jesus and He is the only one that can complete me (Colossians 2:8-19).
He has created me and when I accepted Him into my life He filled any
incompleteness I had by what He did on the cross. He's not my husband,
He is my foundation. Jesus is my end-all-be-all.
In closing, please understand, I know it can be easy to think that a
spouse will fill the empty parts of your life. Heck, I'd love to have a
guy to hang out with all the time, to go see action movies with and go
on adventures exploring new places. Someone who I could make-out with
all the time and not have to worry about anything (what?! you don't
think Christians think of that stuff?) and even someone who is there to
talk to and encourage me at the end of the day, but I don't. There are
days when that makes me sad, but most days it's ok. Tomorrow is a new
day. I still live a pretty good life and I'm still blessed with a lot
of other things. Being single is not what makes me, me. It is just
where I am in my life, and I just happen to be "there" longer than
others. I might even be "there" a lot longer, but that's ok, I'm still a
functioning human.
So lets make a deal, you won't try to make me feel bad for still being
single and I won't brag about still being able to make my own decisions
and live my own life. Well actually I probably will. I guess we'll
just have to agree to disagree on this one.
Sincerely,
A Functioning Single
