Incompatible

Some people are really, really the wrong person to marry. Everyone else is still naturally incompatible.
— Timothy Keller (@timkellernyc) July 15, 2014

This tweet made me laugh yesterday.  Mainly because of how true it really is, but the really funny part is that we think the exact opposite.

As singles, it's so easy to get so consumed with the idea that there is someone out there and we could meet them at any moment, that we literally think any new encounter could one day result in an "I do".  Every encounter with the opposite sex becomes an interview process and if they don't get the "job", well then moving on... 

Out of all the people we meet on a day-to-day basis, we really are incompatible with most of them.  That does not mean you can't be friends, it just means you're most likely not going to want to go on a second or third date with them, let alone spend the rest of your life with them. So why put so much pressure on yourself as well as the next unsuspecting victim of your interview process?

I'm not sure why Pastor Keller wrote that tweet, but I would guess that it's a good reminder to not marry any Joe-shmo that comes around and to chill out on the seeking-a-significant-other front.  The chances are the next person you meet will not be your future spouse.

But of course I've been wrong before...


**Most likely I took this tweet out of context, so lets just say this is my own interpretation of it.  But most likely Pastor Keller was referring to the fact that you have to work at marriage.  He's wise and clever like that.**

Never Alone

Sometimes the best encouragement you can give someone is just letting them know that they are not alone.

That is one of the reasons I write about the single life.  Everyone goes through different things, and everyone's journey through singleness is different.  For some, their journey is short, others, it's long and complicated.  Some date more than others, some talk about it more than others, most complain about it, while others accept it, but no matter what, we all experience it at one point or another.

For those of us that are in this stage of life longer than others, there is discouragment, frustration, episodes of craziness, and sometimes just straight times of anger.  There are also the good things, such as lessons learned, experiences that will go in our data banks of memory that no matter what, we would never trade.  Either way, it's a journey that is not meant to be accomplished alone.

It's one of the reason that fellowship is emphasized so strongly in the Bible ("Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ." Galations 6:2, "Iron sharpens iron, So one man sharpens another." Proverbs 27:17).  We are simply just not meant to go through this life alone.  I'm not even talking about a significant other, I'm simply talking about going through life with those other humans that understand you, make you laugh, that carry on conversations that are deep and at the same time can go and talk about absolutely nothing, yet both conversations are equally meaningful. 

So even though there are so many times that we feel alone in this big world, we never are.  There is always someone else out there that will be going through something similar that you are going through.  You may not know them, but they are out there.  Writing helps me with that.  I write, hoping that the person that reads my writing, will know that they are not alone either.  You may feel lonely, but you are never alone.